Last time Paris Hilton was in London, she made a baffling $140,000 in appearance fees. This time around, with the struggling economy, she only managed to make $50,000. Let’s all stop filling that job application for McDonald’s for a second and laugh at her. Haha, you suck.

‘Paris demanded £50,000 from Paper nightclub. They were prepared to pay – but on the condition that she turn up twice, not go anywhere else before or after that evening, and stay for a minimum of two hours.

‘But she didn’t want to adhere to all the conditions so the club cancelled her appearance.’