HoffSpace: the new social network by David Hasselhoff

20Aug2008 Filed under: links Author: Attu

HoffSpace Intro by The Hoff himself: – In my travels round the world I have always been surprised that no matter where I go people recognize and know me, from Europe, Australia and India to the Philippines and the Zulu Nation in South Africa. This got me thinking… I realized that while two people from two entirely different countries and backgrounds may seem to have nothing in common, the only thing they might have in common is me… So I decided to start a network where people from across the world might come together and get a conversation started over me. Where it will lead, I don’t know but the world would be a better place if everyone talked a little more to each other… -

400 Responses to “HoffSpace: the new social network by David Hasselhoff”

Celebrity Photos, Pictures, Images » Blog Archive » Quickies Redux
August 21st, 2008 at 15:02

[...] Tom and Katie living separate lives [ICYDK] + THe Hoff has his own social network [Attuworld] + Paris Hilton launches search for a British best friend [Cele|bitchy] + Petra Nemcova refresher [...]
Quickies Redux | Celebrityopps.net : Latest Celebrity Gossips,Daily!
August 26th, 2008 at 15:45

[...] Tom and Katie living separate lives [ICYDK] + THe Hoff has his own social network [Attuworld] + Paris Hilton launches search for a British best friend [Cele|bitchy] + Petra Nemcova refresher [...]
LISA JANE
September 17th, 2008 at 08:49

HI DAVIDHASSELHOFF IWOULD LIKE TOINVITED YOU FOR A HOT CUP OF COFFEE AND A CHOLATE ROLL FOR YOU DAVIDHASSELHOFF PLEASE CAN I TAKE YOUR HAND AND INVITED YOU IN TO THE KNIGHTRIDER ART ROOM AND PLEASE DAVIDHASSELHOFF YOU ARE IN FOR FUN DAY OF DOING LOTS OF ART WORK
LISA JANE
September 17th, 2008 at 08:52

WILL YOU MARRY ME DAVIDHASSELHOFF THIS SAT PLEASE COME RIGHT NOW AND I CAN ASK YOU TO MARRY ME
LISA JANE
January 20th, 2009 at 20:29

DEAR DAVID HASSELHOFF I WOULD LIKE TO INVITED YOU RIGHT NOW DAVIDHASSELHOFF TO HAVE A GAME ON THE WILL GAME TENPIN BOWLING IT START OF WITH 10 PINS AND AND IT GOES UP IN NUMBER OF PINS AND IM GOING HAVE A GOOD TIME WITH MY BOYFRIEND DAVIDHASSELHOFF AND DAVID HASSELHOFF I WOULD LIKE YOU TO STAY THE NIGHT WITH US DAVID HASSELHOFF YOU ARE WELCOME TO STAY IN MY ROOM
LISA JANE
January 20th, 2009 at 20:31

DAVID HASSELHOFF WILL YOU MARRY ME DAVID HASSELHOFF IN TEN YEARS TIME
Yaikz
January 20th, 2009 at 21:05

Lisa Hasselhoff, stop hasseling us…
LISA JANE
January 25th, 2009 at 17:06

DAVID HASSELHOFF IM NOT HASSELING YOU DAVID HASSELHOFF I WOIULD LIKE TO INVITED YOU FOR A FUN EVING IN THE IN THE ART ROOM IS CALLED QUICK AND CRAFTY ART ROOM
LISA JANE
April 14th, 2009 at 15:06

DEAR DAVID HASSELHOFF I WOULD LIKE TO IN VITED YOU DAVID HASSELHFF TO HAVE A FUN AFTER NOON IN THE QUICK AND CRAFTY ART ROOM PLEASE COME DAVID HASSELHOFF RIGHT NOW IN YOUR BLACK CAR
LISA JANE
June 28th, 2009 at 18:18

DEAR DARLING DAVID HASSELHOFF IWOULD LIKE TO INVITED YOU DAVID HASSELHOFF IWOULD LIKE TO TAKE YOU IN TO OUR ART ROOM DAVID HASSELHOFF AND IWOULD LIKE TO KISS YOU DAVID HASSELHOFF PLEASE DAVID HASSELHOFF PLEASE COME IN YOUR BMW CAR RIGHT NOW
LISA JANE
June 28th, 2009 at 18:23

IHAVE FOUND THE MAN OF MY DREAMS AND THAT MAN IS YOU DAVID HASSELHOFF PLEASE COME RIGHT NOW AND IHAVE GOT SOME NIGHT FOR YOU DARLIG DAVID HASSELHOFF WILL YOU MARRY ME DAVID HASSELHOFF THIS WEEKEND
LISA JANE
July 4th, 2009 at 08:29

DEAR DAVID HASSELHOFF IWOULD LIKE TO INVITED YOU DAVID HASSELHOFF FOR A HOT CUP OF COFFEE AND SOME TOSTA TO EAT FOR DAVID HASSELHOFF YOU CAN BRING YOUR COFFEE AND YOUR TOAST IN TO LISA AND DAVID ART ROOM PLEASE COME RIGHT IN YOUR BMW CAR DAVID HASSELHOFF AND IWOULD LIKE TO TAKE YOU IN TO LISA AND DAVID ART ROOMPLEASE COME RIGHT NOW
LISA JANE
July 4th, 2009 at 08:34

SEXY HUNK DAVID HASSELHOFF IWOULD INVITED YOU FOR A CUP OF COFFEE RIGHT NOW DAVI HASSELHOFF
Yaikz!
July 4th, 2009 at 10:16

LISA Jane you are disturbed, but since you are not promoting anything (I think…) and it is kinda funny I will not ban you
LISA JANE
July 4th, 2009 at 21:17

PLEASE DAVID HASSELHOFF COME AND HAVE A FUN EVING IN LISAAND DAVID ART ROOM PLEASE COME RIGHT NOW YOU SEXY HUNK
wtf
July 4th, 2009 at 21:35

“lisa jane” is obviously just MrB’s alter-ego, since no one else but him could possibly be that stupid and annoying. maybe the B stands for “baywatchfan”..??
hoff girl
July 14th, 2009 at 19:42

lisa jane you are sick go away
hoff girl
July 14th, 2009 at 20:30

to owners lisa jane is sick on every website remove her
hoff girl
July 14th, 2009 at 20:32

wtf shut up
wtf
July 15th, 2009 at 00:45

hoff whore, cram it up your foul, gaping twat (which is probably covered in more fur than even the hoff’s chest, and probably stinks even worse than his “acting”).
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 01:59

wtf shut up jealous im not a whore you are how dare you
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 01:59

to owners remove you shit website
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 02:00

wtf you make me sick how nasty shut up fuck oh
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 02:02

wft if you dont shut up i kill you pig face how rude
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 02:03

lisa jane troublemaker pig fat tramp drop dead now
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 02:57

hello hoff happy birthday you so cool i love u
The Hoff
July 15th, 2009 at 04:53

Thanks for the birthday wishes, but I want you to stop all this nonsense right now. You’re getting totally carried away and making me look bad. If people think all my fans go around the internet flooding comment sections with senseless drivel like you’ve been doing here, well, they’re liable to think I put you up to it or something, and the next thing you know, I won’t be asked to guest star in any more Spongebob movies.

So I’m afraid I’m going to have to insist that you cease and desist commenting on this site immediately, or else I’ll have to speak with my good friends Attu and Yaikz! and have you banned. I just can’t have my good name besmirched any further by your trollish behavior.

Take care,
The Hoff
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 05:05

i dont believe this is the hoff he never would treat me like that
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 05:05

lisa jane is crazy one not me if this hoff i want proof
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 05:06

besides david never says take care
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 05:07

this is not the hoff anyways he in paris france
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 05:11

tell lisa jane not me
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 05:15

david stop this me from schenectady your no one fan make lisa jane stop not me she is on every website who is this really
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 05:23

further more i only just started lisa jane on every website in world who is this
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 05:37

cant be the hoff your out with your new girlfriend still in london
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 05:41

is this girl girlfriend or friend david hasselhoff would never treat me like that
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 05:56

i dont believe this is david hasselhoff i want proof beside you been out with your new girlfriend all night pictures on wenn
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 06:10

hello hoff why are you answering not u that y
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 06:17

this is not david hasselhoff
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 07:18

i dont believe this is david hasselhoff he doesnt speak in that matter he was also out with his new girlfriend in london all night why would he read this website and he does know me i m not using my real name lisa jane is nuts and on all websites she is sick i want that that is david hasselhoff
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 07:21

well hoff leave a reply this is not the hoff i doubt it
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 07:39

hey hoff this your no one biggest fan from america schdy lady who followed u to london 2004
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 09:22

oh dear maybe that was you david hasselhoff i just heard you on las vegas radio if that was u on hereim sorry i mean no harm it just no one answers my many mails including zillions of cards if someone would answer me i stop i already stopped real mail your really biggest no one fan cfj
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 16:24

ok hoff what is your problem 3 girls in one week come on man she is too young should be me nothem were are your kids grow up mr hasselhoff i dont have ruin your name your doing itt yourself
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 16:43

hey hoff having party friday for birthday please send for me the kids will stop all these women too bad
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 16:52

too bad imissing your big birthday party on friday
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 17:34

knock off david
hoff girl
July 15th, 2009 at 17:43

i want to be at your party this is not fair you aint seen nothing yet
Anonymous
July 15th, 2009 at 18:06

your getting me mad david hof
Anonymous
July 15th, 2009 at 18:50

hi david hasselhoff take me to your party
Anonymous
July 15th, 2009 at 19:15

david hasselhoff how many girlfriends do you have
Anonymous
July 15th, 2009 at 19:20

happy birthday david hasselhoff
Anonymous
July 16th, 2009 at 00:31

hey hoff all too young where are your daughters
Anonymous
July 16th, 2009 at 00:32

me me not them
Anonymous
July 16th, 2009 at 01:37

so where is david hasselhoff
Anonymous
July 16th, 2009 at 05:42

hey hoff im never giving on you
Anonymous
July 16th, 2009 at 16:40

hey hoff send ticket view
Anonymous
July 16th, 2009 at 21:57

see that was not the hoff
Attu
July 16th, 2009 at 22:50

Ahhh. come on the Hoff is everywhere! That is something that cannot be denied!
Anonymous
July 16th, 2009 at 23:06

hey hoff your killing me with your women boy im depressed
Anonymous
July 16th, 2009 at 23:09

attu what are you taking about
Anonymous
July 16th, 2009 at 23:44

i cant believe that was the hoff
Anonymous
July 17th, 2009 at 00:43

to the real david hasselhof the hof i want to wish you happy birthdayjuly 17 2009 i wish could be there maybe someday hope your with t and h i wish talent ticket and view hope i talk to u and see you in person soon your no one biggest fan you said v 2 2007 and more you look awesome have a great day cjf
Anonymous
July 17th, 2009 at 02:09

hey lisa jane leave david hasselhof alone for good
Anonymous
July 17th, 2009 at 15:52

happy birthday david hasselhoff wish i could be at that party i hope you got all my cards and letters etc i still love u always will seeu soon carla jordan
Anonymous
July 17th, 2009 at 18:21

hope hayley at your birthday too
Attu
July 17th, 2009 at 20:16

It’s not my birthday today, but you are all more than welcome to congratulate me today. It isn’t Yaikz’ birthday either, but I know he’ll accept all congratulations just as well. Just like Simon Iddol, NattyB, Flookers and DJ Mick. And I know WTF would be more than happy to not celebrate his birthday today!!!
Simon Iddol
July 17th, 2009 at 20:34

hahahaha, sure
let’s trow a party

so I start my special ‘party without a cause Dj set’ with this song

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NxAd2sHtMf0

oppppppps

maybe it was oil for the fire?

ROLF

I want a flashing jacket like this
Attu
July 17th, 2009 at 20:45

I’ll throw in this one. Let’s rock and roll all night and party every day!
Anonymous
July 17th, 2009 at 20:50

i was wishing david hasselhoff happy birthday you sound like a jerk
Attu
July 17th, 2009 at 21:01

O, but I am, you are absolutely right, I am a jerk, but a handsome jerk! Especially for you I’ll throw in this one, for free!
wtf
July 17th, 2009 at 21:04

woo-hoo! happy 40th birthday, fake moon landing mission!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7lh525NYjzY

yes, we’re gonna have a garden party!
wtf
July 17th, 2009 at 21:09

so hey, hoff freak, your name is carla? and where did you say you live? got sick of boston, did you?

http://www.cheersboston.com/pub/main_cheersfans_cast_carla.html
Attu
July 17th, 2009 at 21:19

To all you David Hasselhoff fans, who mean the world to us, I would like to let you know we have something extra-special to celebrate Da Hoffmeister’s birthday. Let’s all blow out a couple of candles and drink ourselves senseless!
Anonymous
July 17th, 2009 at 23:04

to all jerks i plan i writing david hasselhoff about this asshole website im not a freak wtf but sure are a pig my real name is not carla i dont live in boston i live on moon ha ha ha you are all retarded im prettier that cheers girl that was not the hoff you are assholes first class
Anonymous
July 17th, 2009 at 23:05

wtf dont call me names again asshole
Anonymous
July 17th, 2009 at 23:18

by way stupid cheers was a great show jerk head
Anonymous
July 17th, 2009 at 23:30

by the why dont people use real names huh
Anonymous
July 17th, 2009 at 23:31

i just wrote the hoff im also writing the internet this abuse
Anonymous
July 18th, 2009 at 02:53

happy birthday to you david hasselhoff happy 57 birthday to you see you weirdos
wtf
July 18th, 2009 at 04:46

hey carla, did you really write to the internet to complain about this site? did it write back yet? what did it say? come one, i really want to know!

also, i head that the hoff is secretly gay and has only one testicle. have you heard about that? what’s your take on it (you know, as a hoff expert)? which one is he missing, the right or the left?
Anonymous
July 18th, 2009 at 14:19

wtf fuck you assholegrow up my name is not carla i lied like you david is not gay but you are mine your fucking business queer what an asshole
Anonymous
July 18th, 2009 at 14:34

your no hoff fan get lost leave me alone
Anonymous
July 18th, 2009 at 21:48

hey natalie online david hasselhof you are retarded get a life
Anonymous
July 21st, 2009 at 02:25

heyhoff wish could be at view
Anonymous
July 21st, 2009 at 05:06

hey hoff where is hayley
Anonymous
July 22nd, 2009 at 00:10

hey hoff great on the view
Anonymous
July 22nd, 2009 at 23:21

hey hoff where are you nyc la london paris
Anonymous
July 23rd, 2009 at 19:37

hey hoff what big deal about view you were great but i didnt like your suit jacket sorry
Attu
July 23rd, 2009 at 19:59

hey hoff did you ever nail pamela anderson?
Attu
July 23rd, 2009 at 20:10

Okay, Attuworld is now officially part of Hoffspace: http://www.davidhasselhoff.com/group/attuworld Please join us and see what we can make happen. Maybe we’ll get some behind the scenes nudity stuff from Baywatch when Pam was in there, when Yasmine Bleeth was in there or Gina Lee Nolin. But we’ll settle for Brooke Burns, Brande Roderick, Donna D’Errico, Nicole Eggert, Carmen Electra, Erika Eleniak, Traci Bingham or Angelica Bridges as well. Just don’t give us backstage stuff of Jeremy Jackson and we’re pleased.
Anonymous
July 24th, 2009 at 02:12

too bad think i write the hoff pam and david never made it stupid
Anonymous
July 24th, 2009 at 03:35

how do i get on hoff space i need to speak to the hoff
Anonymous
July 24th, 2009 at 18:22

HEY WHERE IS THE HOFF
ajax2
July 29th, 2009 at 00:05

Thanks it sound really good!
Attu
July 29th, 2009 at 00:29

The Hoff is always near, ALWAYS, but he only appears when you really really need him. That makes him the superhero he is
Attu
July 29th, 2009 at 00:30

Yes, that, and the women in their red bathing suits.
Anonymous
July 29th, 2009 at 02:16

hey you shut up
Anonymous
July 29th, 2009 at 02:16

hey hoff lets hang out in la
wtf
July 29th, 2009 at 06:57

damn! i was wondering whether this ridiculous comment thread would make it to triple digits, and BAM, here it is: 100 comments! that has to be a new attuworld.com record!

and what percentage of them are by the same twisted psycho hoff-stalker? THAT has to be a new attuworld.com record as well!
Attu
July 29th, 2009 at 07:46

Please, Anonymous twit, come forward, create an account and make your comments under a name. Or did your parents name you Anonymous when you were born?
serge
July 29th, 2009 at 09:21

They better had named him asswipe…
wtf
July 29th, 2009 at 09:59

but anonymous DOES have a name— it’s Carla! and as for a last name for her, i suggest “Hoffstalker,” since it pretty much sums up her entire life.

or since the hoff is so big in deutschland, maybe we should go with the german “Hoffstelzer.”

what do you think, carla? is that a cool screen name for you to comment under here on attuworld.com? “Carla Hoffstelzer”..?? you totally have my permission to use it.

all i ask in return is that you stop forgetting to take your meds!
Attu
July 29th, 2009 at 10:55

All the Hoff fans will highly appreciate this as well. I am sure of that, haha
Anonymous
July 29th, 2009 at 13:46

shut up fuck heads you not hoff fans your just assholes leave me alone
Anonymous
July 29th, 2009 at 13:48

im not a twit shut up die die die weirdo queer
Anonymous
July 29th, 2009 at 13:50

i dont need meds but you do drugs use then michael jackson im not a stalker asshole leave me alone weirdo
Anonymous
July 29th, 2009 at 13:53

by the way i met the hoff have any of you assholes
Attu
July 29th, 2009 at 14:10

no, haven’t met him. meeting him didn’t fit in my schedule. but should he still want to sit down with me for a beer or two he knows how to get in touch.
Anonymous
July 29th, 2009 at 15:02

you full of shit
Anonymous
July 29th, 2009 at 15:06

by the way get a life and a job
Attu
July 29th, 2009 at 15:40

Haha, this is my secret for you, so don’t tell anybody else. Okay. Well, this is my job. I get payed for doing useless stuff on the interwebs. And coming across the Hoff and his fans just like you makes this job even more fun.
Anonymous
July 29th, 2009 at 16:13

fuck fuck stupid asshole im writing the hoff you need to be removed
Anonymous
July 29th, 2009 at 16:14

asshole
Anonymous
July 29th, 2009 at 16:20

dont have anything better todo leave me alone
Attu
July 29th, 2009 at 21:57

uhmm, I think you are are here on MY space, not the space owned by the Hoff, if he even owns a bit of space, so think again about complaining.

But you are helping to make this thread the longest comment section on Attuworld and for that I invite you to write even more idiotic comments. In the end it will be somewhere in my wallet, not yours, not the Hoff’s.
Attu
July 29th, 2009 at 21:59

By the way, I think I am drunk, but not like this:
Yaikz!
July 29th, 2009 at 22:22

My first 118th comment! Had to do my share…
Attu
July 29th, 2009 at 22:37

But you could not include a funny comment or a dumb Hoff video? Shame on you! You can do better. I know you can do better!
Yaikz!
July 29th, 2009 at 22:49

I am a n00b, I do not know how to include video… like this?
Yaikz!
July 29th, 2009 at 22:51

Do people know registered visitors can embed video in the comments? Maybe it’s worth a post…
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 01:52

oh shut up weirdo your not hoff fans frauds
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 01:54

fuck up im not stupid but you sure are leave this internet you assholes
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 01:56

want to bet im writing the hoff and telling him about this stupid asshole website
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 02:17

grow up
The Hoff
July 30th, 2009 at 07:08

Hey Attu and Yaikz! It’s been a couple weeks since I’ve had a chance to drop by and check out the site, because of my busy schedule. Just wanted to touch bases with my good Dutch friends and let you know that this is still my favorite website!

Now Carla, as for you: I asked you almost two weeks ago to settle down with all these crazy comments of yours, and here you are, still at it, comment after comment, and with all that foul language, too! And you’re supposed to be a Hoff fan? My real fans would never swear like that, especially at my friends Attu and Yaikz! You should be ashamed of yourself!

I’ll tell you what, though. You have been a fan a long time, and you’ve sent me a lot of nice letters over the years, so here’s a deal for you: apologize to Attu and Yaikz! (and wtf too) for all those nasty things you’ve been saying, and I’ll send a special autographed 8×10 of me and my new lady friend, holding hands at the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris! It’s a beautiful print, and I’m not going to be making these available to the general public, so you’ll be one of the only people in the world to have one. In fact, you and my daughters will probably be the only ones!

So is it a deal? Apologies for all the swearing, a promise not to do it anymore, and in exchange you’ll get a special, unique autographed 8×10. What do you say?

By the way, if you agree, and you want the photo, you’ll need to post your mailing address here in a comment. My personal assistant is very busy with scheduling and doesn’t have time to dig through all the old fan mail to find your address, and I’m not at home, so I can’t do it either. Just post your address here and I’ll have the photo sent ASAP.

And you know Carla, you really should go ahead and register an account here on Attuworld. I’ve known these guys a long time (only online, since we haven’t actually met in person yet), and they’ve really boosted my career with all the publicity they’ve given me. They’re good guys, and you can definitely trust them. Heck, just the fact that they haven’t banned you yet shows how nice they are! So register an account, and then you can post Youtube videos here! That would be a really big favor to me, you know, since you could find all the best Hoff videos online and then share them with all the millions of visitors this site gets!

And WOW! I just got an amazing idea! Carla, why don’t YOU make a video? You know, like a Hoff fan tribute type thing!! I would really love to see something like that! You could post it on Youtube and then embed it in a comment here on this site! What do you think? Could you do something like that for me? It would really mean a lot to me!

And if you don’t know how, don’t worry, because I know Attu or Yaikz! or someone else here on this site would be happy to help!

OK guys, I have to run! You know how it is— the life of an international superstar is all go, go go! No time to hang out in comments sections the way I’d like to! But I’ll talk to you all again soon!

Love,
The Hoff
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 16:59

i dont think this is the hoff they started it
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 17:00

im sorry they started it
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 17:02

i have no email it is broken
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 17:04

i dont way to get video this cant be the hoff
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 17:19

im sorry but i didnt start this
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 17:25

by the mr hasselhoff you swear to i heard you many times
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 17:36

im sorry but i want proof this is the hoff
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 17:38

to the hoff when did i met you
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 17:46

by the way did you ever seehayley blog i never saw such words
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 17:47

i dont believe this the hoff
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 18:02

joe b better look up my address i never post it im not totally crazy i want more proof this david hasselhoff anyone can say that stuff when did i met you first
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 18:19

im sorryim sorry im sorry to all above but i still dont believe this is the hoff
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 18:35

david maybe you should read these all again wtf more then me
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 18:42

by the way one of those guys called me a hoff whore check it out how nasty is that mr hasselhoff
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 18:49

if your not at home how are going to send me a photo i may call agt to get to bottom of this something is just not right
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 19:09

hey hoff i got a cool idea if this is you say hello to me on your website for real ok
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 19:12

one more thing i want that photo if it really you i still dont believe it anyways
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 19:18

im sorry but all people swear including you and your family i have heard it and by the way i met you when first time for real i want the truth
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 20:09

dear david hasselhoff if this is really you your terrible mean letter really has upset my a great deal you have always been so nice and sweet to me what happen first all they all were nasty first i was only defending myself you need to read again second of all everyone swears and including all of you i have heard you third of all if this is really you when did i met you and you always call me your biggest no one fan and hi baby third of all new lady that should be me good luck toher videos never you world can laugh at me no thanks my email is broken like my heart joe b better look up my address i want more proof this is really you i will not go to talent now unless you do it i spend all my money on you and you know if mr hasselhoff im sad mad and depressed about this furthermore i had a terrible incident last year which i wrote real mail about and not even im sorry something is not right here cjf you not the same anymore see around sometime im sorry for misunderstanding
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 20:39

david hasselhof check website on put my address on ask david that all i can do but i still dont believe it
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 22:31

ok im done here i apologized and i will not again so i told you i dont have email i will never post my address so joe will have find it the normal way by the way check your blackberry you probably have it something is not right here at all i want the truth write back until then i done
Attu
July 30th, 2009 at 23:18

the Hoff will be disappointed BIG TIME, I am sure of that. And what to think of Pamela Anderson? She could use a little more sympathy from the David Hasselhoff and Hans Klok fans!
Anonymous
July 30th, 2009 at 23:35

hey guys does anyone really know how to get a hold of the hoff or im being given a snow job this is not funny
Anonymous
July 31st, 2009 at 00:03

whar are you talking about he can get my address i will not b so dumb as to post anything i met hans he was very nice
Anonymous
July 31st, 2009 at 00:04

met pam too not very friendly
Anonymous
July 31st, 2009 at 00:17

the real hoff can go look at his fan mail if he wants to bad enough
Anonymous
July 31st, 2009 at 00:27

ok i have tell you this david tomorrow i send you a letter it will have my name and address etc if this is real hoff please send that photo thank you
Anonymous
July 31st, 2009 at 03:25

well see you guys around im really really done here but if i find out and i will that that was not david your all in big trouble i will find out since i wrote him real mail bye byehave a hoff life
wtf
July 31st, 2009 at 03:35

oh man… you’re not really leaving for good, are you carla?

say it isn’t so! it won’t be the same around here without you!
Anonymous
July 31st, 2009 at 22:16

now see hoff they are picking on me please leave me alone im trying to leave
wtf
July 31st, 2009 at 23:37

what? i’m not picking on you! i’m being sincere! i really don’t want you to leave!

in fact, i apologize for calling you “hoff whore.” seriously. i’m sorry. i actually thought you were someone else— that’s the reason i was so mean.

so will you stay?
Yaikz!
July 31st, 2009 at 23:41

yeah carla, stay….pleazzzze!
Anonymous
August 1st, 2009 at 03:02

one more thing where my photo hoff you have my address i have been fooled before if this the real send me that photo please i want the truth
Anonymous
August 1st, 2009 at 03:13

well guys i will think about it but i still not sure that was the hoff i have been fooled before and i really dont have email i think about it
wtf
August 1st, 2009 at 03:22

so carla, are you going to stick around?

and you know, i bet the Hoff is a pretty busy guy. it’s probably not realistic to expect him to be able to drop everything and search through all the millions of letters he gets to find your address. i think you’ll have to be patient about that pic.

and besides, think about this: how does the Hoff know you’re really who you say you are? you seem like an intelligent person, so surely you realize that a lot of people on the internet lie about their identity, right? so for all he knows, you’re not REALLY carla at all… think about it from his perspective. you’ve been posting on here as “anonymous” all this time; you could be just about anyone, PRETENDING to be carla jordan from schenectady. maybe part of the reason he wants you to post your address is to PROVE that you’re really who you say you are.

now, personally, i totally agree that it’s not a good idea to post your address online for everyone in the world to see. but still, you can’t just post as “anonymous” all the time and expect people to believe you’re really who you say you are. ANYONE can post on here as “anonymous,” you know?

so seriously— you should register an account on here. it’s VERY easy to do, and all you need is an email account. i know you said yours is “broken,” but there are tons of free web-based email sites. you could go to hotmail, gmail, yahoo, wherever, and register a new email address, then come here and register an account on attuworld! then when you post comments for the Hoff, he’ll know for sure that it’s actually you.

so at least consider that, ok? and seriously, if you need help with any of that, just ask!
Anonymous
August 1st, 2009 at 03:30

i have nothing to say right now maybe i come back later on
Anonymous
August 1st, 2009 at 03:46

i see again sometime not now ok stop im really this person no one else knows i even like david my email is broken and i still dont believe that is david he knows it is me no one else could use my name get real half my family and friends dont even know about the hoff and me i refuse tto use email so there and david knows it is the real me i told that a million times if you think i use email on any webssite think again im the real person what is your real name anyways furthermore no one was talking to you anyways so long for now maybe your doing the hof thing i dont know but stop now please thank you see ya
wtf
August 1st, 2009 at 04:09

my name is boris bärsak, i live in dixon, CA, and i do audio production/voice-over work. anything else you want to know?

also, what’s the deal with the rudeness? i already said i was sorry for calling you “hoff whore.” and you know, if you look back at the early part of this comment thread, you were rude to me first, before i ever said one word to you. so as far as you and i are concerned, YOU actually started it. and yet i’m willing to forgive and forget, and i’m trying to be nice and help you register an account. and still you’re being rude to me. why?

and carla, do you not realize that you can create a brand new email address, JUST for the purpose of registering an attuworld account? you don’t have to use the email for anything else— it wouldn’t even be like a “real” email at all! you would just use it when you register here so that wordpress can send you your account info. then you log into your email, get your password, log into your new attuworld wordpress account, and then forget that the new email address even exists. you’d never have to use it again. heck, you’d never have to even THINK about it ever again!

and you could even click the little box that says “remember me” when you log into your attuworld account, and then you’d never have to think about that ever again either. all your comments from then on would say “carla” (or whatever name you pick) at the top, in red, and that way the Hoff would know for sure that they were from you, and no one else.

at least consider it, ok?
Anonymous
August 1st, 2009 at 04:23

why do wantmy email so badly your not getting it leavee me alone
wtf
August 1st, 2009 at 04:43

huh? carla, I DO NOT WANT YOUR EMAIL. i think you’ve misunderstood. what i’m saying is that you can start a totally new email account, use it register here, and then never use it again. and you definitely don’t need to give the email address to me or anyone else, other than wordpress (when you register here). i am not affiliated with wordpress or with this site in any way, so i will have no way of getting your email address.

and besides, you can register an email address, use it to register here, and then NEVER use that email address again. so it wouldn’t even matter if anyone knew it— it wouldn’t be your real email address anyway!

why are you so paranoid? are you just a suspicious person by nature? i’m not trying to con you, carla. i just want you to register an account and continue posting comments here. there’s nothing in it for me other then the entertainment value of seeing how long this comment thread will eventually end up being.

plus, if you keep posting comments, then the Hoff will keep posting every once in a while too, and i think that’s cool!

also, why don’t any of your friends know what a big Hoff fan you are? why are you keeping it a secret?
Anonymous
August 1st, 2009 at 05:54

none of your business and leave me alone right now i had enough it he doesnt want me to do this so stop it right now
Anonymous
August 1st, 2009 at 05:55

bug off already just knock it off
Anonymous
August 1st, 2009 at 06:07

ok im going to forget this website right now enough is enough i still dont that was the hoff i wrote him real my yeah i have his address i get to bottom of this nonsense yet goodbye i read for a laugh and that is it this is too nuts
Anonymous
August 2nd, 2009 at 23:30

i must know the truth was that the hoff it doesnt sound right to me the hoff would never talk to me in that matter someone better come clean now
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2009 at 01:09

to the person who calling themselves the hoff please come clean right now i need to know if this is the hoff dont make me call melvin goldsman the hoff attorney i know his number i must know the truth soon orelse i will contact the hoff attornies
Yaikz!
August 3rd, 2009 at 01:49

It was The (real) Hoff, but he is on a vacation now, he sends love. So love from The Hoff to you all, he will be back in 2 weeks. He promissed to send some pics from his vacation.
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2009 at 02:29

i dont believe you furthermore talent starts up again new tuesday here in la i find out yet
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2009 at 02:32

where on vacation talents starts tuesday check it out i just dont believe you
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2009 at 02:38

i dont think so
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2009 at 02:49

live performances of talent begin tues im sure david will be i dont think he takes two weeks
wtf
August 3rd, 2009 at 02:52

carla, how are today? glad to see you’re still here!

but i have to ask you: why are you so suspicious and angry and hostile? haven’t you realized yet that this is a fun site, where almost everyone is nice and friendly? why don’t you relax a little? seriously, i’m probably the biggest asshole who ever comments here, so if I’M being nice to you, then you really have nothing to worry about.

i think you need to make friends with earl. have you met earl? he comments here a lot, and he’s always talking about how he wants everyone to find inner peace and play nice. maybe you should get a dialog going with him.

he seems to have a problem dealing with bad language though, so you’ll have watch the potty-mouth stuff. but you’ve been pretty good about that lately, so i think you’ll be ok!

did you get that pic yet from the hoff? the one he was going to mail you?
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2009 at 03:40

oh good away i refuse to speak to you any further
wtf
August 3rd, 2009 at 04:52

so i guess that means you haven’t received the pic yet?

well don’t worry, i’m sure it’s on its way.
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2009 at 07:17

wribg david cant be on vacation america got talent new tuesday check out
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2009 at 07:18

wrong wrong wrong all wrong
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2009 at 07:19

i wish you stop talking to me
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2009 at 08:32

you better check out things david will be talent then next two weeks not on vacation check it first
serge
August 3rd, 2009 at 08:59

Amrerica got talent is recorded last week! David is on a holiday now! And he deserved one with fans like this…
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2009 at 19:21

no way check out on camera audiences i want proof who are you
Anonymous
August 4th, 2009 at 00:23

where do find this i see it nowhere this website is nowhere
wtf
August 4th, 2009 at 02:26

now carla, you may not realize this, but serge happens to be attuworld’s resident media expert. when it comes to celebrities and TV shows, the guy is pretty much never wrong. if he says AGT was filmed last week, then you can take that to the bank, baby!

did you get the picture yet?
Anonymous
August 4th, 2009 at 05:12

im not speaking to you i think your all wrong and nuts leave me alone
Anonymous
August 4th, 2009 at 14:23

i think it live live live
wtf
August 6th, 2009 at 06:54

hey carla, when the pic shows up in the mail, do you think you could scan it and post it here for all of us to see? i’m sure we’d all love to see it! what do you say?
Anonymous
August 7th, 2009 at 00:19

to all you people check david website that was live he is not on vacation and that is not him no no no no leave me alone this is not right
Yaikz!
August 7th, 2009 at 00:24

everybody knows the hoff has a lookalike to double when he is on a vacation…
Anonymous
August 7th, 2009 at 00:36

i wrote his lawyers and him i get to bottom of this
Anonymous
August 7th, 2009 at 01:23

i told stop your harassing me and im sick of it
Anonymous
August 7th, 2009 at 01:59

give up david website shows him at talent with piers last night check it out your wrong and nuts
Anonymous
August 7th, 2009 at 02:00

your crazy i never heard of a double knock it off now i wrote his lawyers
Anonymous
August 7th, 2009 at 02:02

pay attention david is with piers last night see website not on vacation
Anonymous
August 7th, 2009 at 02:09

are you calling him a liar now he said last night at results look up his hoff space
Anonymous
August 8th, 2009 at 02:24

you are all wrong check out david hoff space new videos today not on vacation home in la not the hoff i like to sue you
Anonymous
August 8th, 2009 at 02:43

and it is not two weeks and not stupid i proof im right
Anonymous
August 10th, 2009 at 06:31

so where is the hoff huh
Anonymous
August 10th, 2009 at 21:18

this is all lie david not on vacation right in la check out his website and also on ryan radio show weds we get the trruth
Anonymous
August 10th, 2009 at 21:25

that is in la i know where and that joe t and justice taylor boyfriend you know nothinghe is not on vacation
Mr. Know-It-All: Nine Signs You Might Be Twitter Trash | Blog Salad | Ron S. Doyle - Professional Freelance Writer
August 10th, 2009 at 23:57

[...] who really want to get to know you—and makes you no better than the anonymous commenters on HoffSpace. If you’d like to remain anonymous, you probably shouldn’t be on the internet in the [...]
Anonymous
August 11th, 2009 at 05:06

i told you people i dont have email and mine your business this notyour problem is it
Anonymous
August 11th, 2009 at 05:07

im not trash leave me alone im right about all this
Anonymous
August 11th, 2009 at 05:09

furthermore i never said i was better i just dont have email get got it get lost
Anonymous
August 11th, 2009 at 05:11

leave me alone alot of people are anoymous on internet why is this your business
Anonymous
August 11th, 2009 at 05:29

who are you this is not your business and these people dont know what they are talking about so there
wtf
August 11th, 2009 at 06:51

hey carla, you know a lot about the hoff— does he work with universal at all? maybe have a contract with them? doing some shows or projects for them? because i saw him! i was in LA over the weekend, and i went to Universal Studios and after the tour thing i went into the seafood restaurant they have there, and i saw the hoff! he was eating a table by himself off in a corner, in a secluded area, and they had it sort of roped off to keep people from bugging him. but people were still waving at him and stuff (and he was waving back). they have these big sourdough rounds there, and he was totally chowing down on one like he hadn’t eaten for a couple days. he didn’t look drunk at all, so i wasn’t sure if it was him, but then someone yelled “hoff!” and he looked up and waved and smiled (with his mouth full, which was gross, but it was dark in there so he could get away with it).

after a while he got up and left through the kitchen, i guess so he didn’t have to use the regular exit and get mobbed by all the obsessed fans (i’ve heard that some people go a little bonkers and carry the whole “hoff fan” thing WAY too far). he looked bigger than i thought he’d be. like, taller, but also just all around big. how tall is he?

anyway, i thought it was cool to see him, since we’ve all been talking about him on here so much. totally unexpected, too. crazy how life works sometimes, huh? i didn’t even know he was in LA, and then BAM, there he is, eating like 20 yards from me.

but anyway, the reason i ask about whether he has any projects going on with universal is because he sure looked to me like he was just taking it easy, hanging out, eating, like a man on vacation. but you seem so sure he’s working right now, so i was just wondering if you had any inside info that might shed some light on what he was doing at Universal Studios eating sourdough bread in a seafood restaurant, smiling with his mouth full some some kind of hayseed.

oh, btw, glad to see you’re still hanging around this site! we’d all miss you if you stopped coming around, you know!
hoff woman girl
August 11th, 2009 at 16:51

what is the deal my email and my name it is no one businesses period
hoff woman girl
August 11th, 2009 at 16:53

liar leave me alonei dont believe you at all
hoff woman girl
August 11th, 2009 at 17:13

he lives in la check out his website i want proof he on water all weekend grow up
hoff woman girl
August 11th, 2009 at 17:24

also doing a photo shoot for calendar if you really saw him
hoff woman girl
August 11th, 2009 at 17:48

furthermore why would david hasselhoff care if im on this website give me a break enough
Serge
August 11th, 2009 at 19:27

I think David hasselhoff is gay, but because it would ruin his carreer he Will not admit it… Like George Michael, he had loads of girlfans and is gay.
hoff woman girl
August 12th, 2009 at 02:38

go way he is not gay
hoff woman girl
August 12th, 2009 at 02:38

but you might be
hoff woman girl
August 12th, 2009 at 02:46

he will not like this silly website anymore
hoff woman girl
August 12th, 2009 at 07:37

he is not gay be silent at once
wtf
August 12th, 2009 at 11:01

the hoff is not gay. everyone knows that gay men never smile with their mouths full of half-chewed sourdough bread. they smile with their mouths full of things like ranch dressing or whipped cream or italian sausage or mountain oysters. but not sourdough.

also, he was in a seafood restaurant when i saw him over the weekend. gay men never eat in seafood restaurants, because they can’t stand the smell of fish.

and don’t forget, the hoff is popular in germany, and in germany the gay men all eat each other. no one has eaten the hoff yet, so obviously, he must be straight.
hoff woman girl
August 12th, 2009 at 17:31

you people are not right in the head david just on ryan seacreast radio live not on vacation not at universal not on this websit agt live your nuts all of you not gay be slient all of you im writing him today be gone
hoff woman girl
August 12th, 2009 at 17:35

jerks
wtf
August 12th, 2009 at 17:38

carla, what are you so mad about? i just stuck up for the hoff and said he wasn’t gay.

and how does him being on the radio mean that he wasn’t at Universal Studios over the weekend?
hoff woman girl
August 12th, 2009 at 18:21

le
hoff woman girl
August 12th, 2009 at 18:27

leave me alone he was on radio i bet he was not at universal just leave me alone
tafkad
August 12th, 2009 at 18:40

I work at Universal and David Hasselhoff indeed did a radioshow over here.
hoff woman girl
August 12th, 2009 at 19:02

what is called i like proof to hear it
hoff woman girl
August 12th, 2009 at 19:32

ryan show is live today not at universals
hoff woman girl
August 12th, 2009 at 23:48

ok folks will the real david hasselhoff please stand up this too im sick all lies and fighting grow up all of you and leave me alone im his biggest no one fan i dontcare i know better this is not right not at all im going to write and get you all removed so long fools
hoff woman girl
August 13th, 2009 at 00:51

you people need to check hoffspace and america got talent website that the truth not this website
wtf
August 13th, 2009 at 02:42

wait… you’re gonna write to the hoff to get us removed… from attuworld.com? how is that going to work? and what are we getting banned FOR? i guess i’m getting banned for seeing the hoff eat sourdough, tafkad is getting banned for working at universal, serge is getting banned for knowing that AGT is taped in advance, and attu and yaikz! are getting banned (from their own site!) for giving the hoff a bunch of free publicity and traffic for his site…? is that right? am i understanding this correctly?

carla, seriously, you need to lighten up. and i’m curious— who did you love before you loved the hoff? like, before knight rider ever debuted and you saw the hoff’s awesome double afros (one on his head, one on his chest) for the first time and fell head over heels, whose number one fan where you? in other words, whose posters did you have to tear down from your walls to make room for the all the hoff ones you ran out and bought after seeing that first episode of knight rider back in ‘82?

also, are you german?
hoff woman girl
August 13th, 2009 at 05:49

leave me alone this is harassment go away i m fan since young and restless so there and met him 1994 how about you go away leave isnt right
hoff woman girl
August 13th, 2009 at 05:50

none of your business any of it get lost im mean it im sick of this junk
hoff woman girl
August 13th, 2009 at 05:53

be silent
hoff woman girl
August 13th, 2009 at 05:54

no im american where you from mars
hoff woman girl
August 13th, 2009 at 06:04

why are onlyone on here huh
hoff woman girl
August 13th, 2009 at 06:14

LEAVE ME ALONE STOP STOP STOP GET ALIFE STOP RUINING MINE
hoff woman girl
August 13th, 2009 at 06:33

HEY HOFF SEE HOW THEY SPEAK TO ME THIS STINKS
hoff woman girl
August 13th, 2009 at 06:43

I DONT TOO MANY OTHERS ON HERE BUT YOU WHY IS THAT HUH
hoff woman girl
August 13th, 2009 at 06:53

DONT TELL ME WHAT TO DO THIS NOT YOUR BUSINESS THIS IS HARASSEMENT I HAVE GOTTEN OTHER WEBSITES REMOVE BEFORE I WILL DO IT AGAIN
hoff woman girl
August 13th, 2009 at 07:02

NO COMMENT GOOD GOOD NIGHT
hoff woman girl
August 14th, 2009 at 09:05

i have had a very tough life it is getting any better leave my name off this website and i really will not be on it again im telling that not him and no one saw him so goodbye toyou fraud this aint worth it not on vacation and that is live wrong wrong all wrong have a hoff life
Yaikz!
August 14th, 2009 at 09:11

goodbye, was fun while it lasted
hoff woman girl
August 14th, 2009 at 18:01

oh shut up
carla
August 21st, 2009 at 12:59

I’ve been reading all of this and just don’t know what to think, except the pic of that devilish clown is YOU- Attu! Isn’t it? So much to say…..but now I’m sleepy. Goodnight, Attu.
wtf
August 22nd, 2009 at 04:22

hmmm… you’re definitely not the REAL carla.
Anonymous
August 22nd, 2009 at 15:36

i wasnt going to do this anymore but stop using my name that is not hoff woman girland leave me alone im trying to stop and that was not the hoff go away all of you
wtf
August 22nd, 2009 at 22:25

now THAT’S the real carla!

carla (REAL carla, that is), attuworld.com is a lot like the Hotel California… you can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave!

you see, try as you might, you’ll never be able to stay away, and i think you’re finally starting to realize that. and that’s good! accepting the fact that you’re addicted to attuworld is the first step towards letting go and having fun!

now you should start commenting on some of the other posts. just look around, find something you think is interesting, and start chiming in (there are even other posts about the hoff, if you’re not ready to branch out to new subject matter yet)! i don’t think anyone here will be mean to you, because we all want you to stay.
Anonymous
August 23rd, 2009 at 01:27

shut up and leave me i hate you weirdos i will not stand this anymore pick on someone else only addicted hoff you are a troublemaker and i know all this is you so stop maybe sue this stupid website
Anonymous
August 23rd, 2009 at 23:42

stop stop stop shut up leave me alone for million times i hate you all im leaving forr good that was not the hoff
Anonymous
September 3rd, 2009 at 19:57

this is for the hoff only everyone be silent i wil not responsed david hasselhoff awesome performance wish i could have been there
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
September 3rd, 2009 at 22:48

DEAR MR DAVID HASSELHOFF PLEASE DAVID HASSELHOFF CAN YOU GET A FLIGHT OUT OF LOSLANGLES RIGHT NOW AND FRIDAY AFTER NOON IWOULD LIKE TO ASK YOU OUT ON A DEATE TO BRIGHTON FOR THE AFTER NOON FROM 1PM TO 4.3OPM AND DAVID HASSELHOFF HOW DO YOU FANCY HAVING THE WEEKEND OUR PLACE DAVID HASSELHOFF PLEASE COME RIGHT NOW
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
September 3rd, 2009 at 22:53

DAVID HASSELHOFF PLEASE CAN BE YOUR NEW GIRLFRIEND ?
DAVID HASSELHOFF PLEASE CAN YOUR BE MY NEW GUY ?
DAVID HASSELHOFF HOW DO YOU FANCY GOING ON A DEATE TO BRIGHTON ON FRIDAY AFTER NOON FROM 1PM TO 4.30 PM
PLEASE DAVID HASSELHOFF COME RIGHT NOW
Anonymous
September 3rd, 2009 at 23:38

lisa jane go away now
TheBadMonkey
September 4th, 2009 at 00:11

I love this thread.
hoff real girlfriend
September 4th, 2009 at 01:24

lisa jane leave my man alone he is my david not yours
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 12th, 2009 at 13:39

DEAR DAVID HASSELHOFF THINK YOU ASK ME OUT TO LUNCH ILOVE TO HAVE LUNCH WITH YOU DAVID HASSELHOFF HOW BOUT WE HAVE TEA OUT TO GETHER IN PIZZA HUT PLEASE CAN YOU GET A FLIGHT OUT OF BERLEY HILLS RIGHT NOW DAVID HASSSELHOFF
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 12th, 2009 at 13:40

DAVID HASSELHOFF IWOULD LIKE TO MARRY YOU THIS WEEKEND
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 12th, 2009 at 13:42

DAVID HASSELHOFF IWOULD LIKE YOU TO COME TO MY ROOM AND WE CAN HAVE FULL ON SEX TO GETHER IN BED NAKED PLEASE COME AND WE CAN DO IT
The Hoff
November 12th, 2009 at 20:54

Wow! Now that’s the kind of fan I like! So, not just sex, but naked sex, huh? That’s an offer I can’t refuse!

When do you want to do this? I’m free all weekend! And can you give me some directions to your room?
carol baker
November 18th, 2009 at 01:31

hi david been watching yre tv series you are so likable me an my husband wld love to hve a night out with you you are a great person luv yah carol xx
The Hoff
November 18th, 2009 at 04:28

Wait, you AND your husband? Sorry Carol, the Hoff doesn’t swing that way! But maybe I can bring Carla or Lisa Jane along and we can swap!
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 18th, 2009 at 14:00

HI DAVID HASSELHOFF HOW ARE YOU TODAY DAVID HASSELHOFF AND YOUR GIRLS DAVID HASSELHOFF ARE YOU FREE ALL DAY PLEASE CAN YOU GET A FLIGHT OUT OF LOSLANGLES RIGHT NOW YOUR GIRLFRIEND WOULD LIKE TO SEEYOU DAVID HASSELHOFF PLEASE CAN YOU COME RIGHT NOW AND WE CAN HAVE FUN IN THE ART ROOM PLEASE COME RIGHT NOW
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 18th, 2009 at 14:05

1IM GOING TEGLE DAVID
2IM GOING LET HIM HAVE A GO AT ARTWORK
3 IM GOING ASK HIM TO BE MY MAN
4 IM GOING ASK HIM TO KEEP FRI 20 FREE
5IM GING TO KISS DAVID ON THE LIPS
6 IM GOING ASK DAVID OUT ON A DEATE
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 18th, 2009 at 14:10

DAVID HASSELHOFF IHAVE BOOKED US A HOTEL FOR THE WEEKEND THE HOTEL IS CALLED QUEES SPA HOTEL IN BRIGHTON ON BRIGHTON BEEACH PLEASE COME DAVID HASSELHOFF IN YOUR CAR RIGHT NOW IWANT TO MARRY YOU THIS WEEKEND
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 18th, 2009 at 14:13

DAVID HASSELHOFF PLEASE CAN YOU COME RIGHT NOW IN YOUR CAR AND WE CAN HAVE A GOOD TIME IN MY ART ROOM PLEASE DAVID HASSELHOFF KISS ME ON THE LIPS IN MY ART ROOM PLEASE COME RIGHT NOW WE CAN START KISSING
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 18th, 2009 at 14:29

DAVID HASSELHOFF AS YOU COME IN THE FRENT DOOR MY ROOM IS THE FIRST ONE AND DAVID HASSELHOFF ILOVE HAVE SEX WITH YOU TO NIGHT AT 11PM IN MY ART ROOM AND I WOULD LIKE TO SLEEP WITH YOU TO NIGHT PLEASE COME RIHT NOW
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 18th, 2009 at 17:48

DAVID HASSELHOFF WE CAN DO IT TO NIGHT AT 11PM
DAVID HASSELHOFF YOU COME IN THE FRENT DOOR AND MY BEDROOM IS THE FIRST BEDROOM DOOR YOU COME TO IT WILL HAVE ON THE DOOR LISA AND DAVID ART ROOM THE CLOUR OF MY BEDROOM DOOR IS GREEN
PLEASE COME DAVID HASSELHOFF RIGHT NOW IWANT TO KISS YOU
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 18th, 2009 at 17:50

DAVID HASSELHOFF WILL YOU MARRY ME THIS WEEKEND IN QUEES SPA HOTELIN BRIGHTON
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 18th, 2009 at 17:51

DAVID HASSELHOFFPLEASE COME RIGHT NOW
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 18th, 2009 at 17:52

DAVID HASSELHOFF KISS ME ON THE LIPS
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 18th, 2009 at 17:54

HI SEXY HUNK DAVID HASSELHOFF
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 18th, 2009 at 17:56

THE HOFF YOU CAN PUT YOUR HAND DOWN INSIDE MY NEICKERS AND PUL MY TRASE DOWN THE SAME TIME
carol baker
November 19th, 2009 at 01:59

hi david sentyou a message saying me and my husband wd luv to hve a night out with ya we arnt that sort of people david i really meant just me go out with you haha didnt want the hubby getting jelouse
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 19th, 2009 at 22:49

DAVID HASSELHOFF AS YOU COME IN THE FRENT DOOR YOU WALK LONG TO MY BEDROOM DOOR IS LIGHT GREEN AND MY ROOM DOOR HAS GOT A QUICK AND CRAFTY ART ROOM AND DAVID HASSELHOFF IWOULD LIKE TO HAVE SEX IN BED TO NIGHT AT 11PM AND FRI MORINING WE CAN HAVE A SHOWER IN THE MORINING AND MY MUM WOULD LIKE YOU TO HAVE SOMEBREAFASK WITH M
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 19th, 2009 at 22:51

DAVID HASSELHOFF HOW DO YOU FANCY GETTING MARRYED TO ME NAKED
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
November 19th, 2009 at 22:53

PLEASE DAVID HASS CAN YOU GET A FLIGHT OUT OF LOSLANGLES RIGHT NOW YOUR NEW
hoff real girlfriend
November 22nd, 2009 at 05:41

i havent been on here in months that cant be hoff if so answermy mailyou have my number that is lisa jane check out other websites
hoff real girlfriend
November 22nd, 2009 at 05:45

hey hoff come to vegas than this the real carla ihavent been on here in months i cant believe that really you are still in canada call me you have my number sent many cards and letters and photos ask joe
hoff real girlfriend
November 22nd, 2009 at 05:47

one more message call me david tonight joe has my number
hoff real girlfriend
November 22nd, 2009 at 05:49

ok one more i be naked come this is got to be a joke right
hoff real girlfriend
November 22nd, 2009 at 06:38

ok so another one hey hoff david are home what are doing thanksgiving please answer this is carla
The Hoff
November 22nd, 2009 at 09:42

Carol: I knew you were only kidding! I was too! I don’t do any of that swinger pervert stuff. I’m a one-on-one lover!

Lisa Jane: Get some help! I’m really worried about your emotional and mental health and I think you need to talk to a professional.

Carla: Great to see you back here on attuworld.com! I’m planning on spending part of T-day with my daughters, and then spending the rest of it sleeping! Shoot me an email on hoffspace.com and I’ll try to get a reply back to you next week.
hoff real girlfriend
November 22nd, 2009 at 13:47

hey david i cant believe rhis is you are you in la i told you my email broke i send real mail please proof this you you what is my last name
hoff real girlfriend
November 22nd, 2009 at 18:09

hey david are you singing at las vegas bowl again carla
hoff real girlfriend
November 22nd, 2009 at 23:07

hey hoff its me carla are you out there call me wish could get together check real mail happy thanksgiving hope you got all my real cards
The Hoff
November 23rd, 2009 at 05:10

Hi again Carla! I appreciate the cards a great deal! Thanks again for being such a loyal fan!

I was supposed to perform in Vegas next week, but there’s some sort of contractual problem. My people are working on it, but I don’t expect it to get resolved, and that’s fine with me! Like i said, I’m planning on sleeping that day! But if the issues do get taken care of, then I’ll be happy to perform!

You know, I’m starting to check out more of the other articles and comment threads on this site. There’s more around here than just this thread, you know! In fact, I just commented on another article just now, because someone used a very funny old-fashioned word that I hadn’t heard since my Knight Rider days! You should look around, Carla! Some of the stuff here is a little juvenile, but some of the posts are really cool!
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 06:21

help perform where in vegas i cant miss again i havent heard anything where when how do i get a ticket
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 06:27

help perform where in vegas havent heard about ithow do i get ticket cant miss another thing
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 06:29

this cant be the hoff
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 06:29

this cant be the hoff
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 06:35

hey hoff i cant anything on you performing in vegas help me out
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 06:51

david i stillcant find anything about you performing in vegas please let me know where how and when i cant miss you again you have my phone on my cards also sent my photos did you get them come on is really the hoff call me please or write back i havent seen you in person this year got to be there got the money got the time now i need place thanks carla
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 07:24

i still see nothing help i cant miss another even please call me you have no on cards and letters thanks david carla
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 07:44

hey david i cant find you listed anywhere where do i get a ticket if your doing it and what is other website you did thanks carla hi to henry vanila dog peaches taylor hayley and dad and big joe
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 08:37

hey hoff what are you doing new year eve this is carla let party
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 17:01

hey david good morning from vegas i see nothing about you perform in vegas what the story is this really the hoff please call me you have my number did get my photos comeon back please this carla
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 18:51

hello hoff are you out there please are coming to vegas carla
wtf
November 23rd, 2009 at 20:17

woo-hoo! 300 comments! i knew we could get there!

and kudos to you, carla! i think probably 250 of the comments are from you alone! you are definitely the coolest celebrity-obsessed schizophrenic i know!
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 22:00

shut up i only TALK TO THE HOFF
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 22:30

WTF THIS BETTER NOT BE YOU BEING THE HOFF
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 22:34

OH SHUT UP I ONLY TALK TO HOFF
hoff real girlfriend
November 23rd, 2009 at 23:18

HEY HOFF WHERE ARE YOU
hoff real girlfriend
November 24th, 2009 at 03:55

one more time hello hoff help are coming to vegas let hang out this is carla
hoff real girlfriend
November 25th, 2009 at 02:21

hey davd are coming to vegas call me carla left you email on chat
hoff real girlfriend
November 25th, 2009 at 02:23

hey david are coming to vegas call me left no on chat
hoff real girlfriend
November 25th, 2009 at 03:55

hey david are you outthere calling kitt come in this carla
hoff real girlfriend
November 25th, 2009 at 19:07

so hoff are you out there please answer me this is carla
hoff real girlfriend
November 26th, 2009 at 03:39

hey hoff have a happy hoffy thanksgiving hope i see you in person real soon i miss you carla
hoff real girlfriend
November 26th, 2009 at 16:37

ok david i have looked at everything i see nothing about you coming to vegas please let me know carla
hoff real girlfriend
November 26th, 2009 at 16:56

david are you singing at las vegas bowl again
hoff real girlfriend
November 26th, 2009 at 19:22

i dont think that the hoff wenn shows lax 25
hoff real girlfriend
November 26th, 2009 at 20:03

is this really hoff i just still dont believe on wenn lax looks back from canada or london i m not sure please answer the hoff only i will not speak to anyone else here come in hoff please this is carla
hoff real girlfriend
November 28th, 2009 at 18:25

oh my god david in hospital again hope he is still alive
hoff real girlfriend
November 30th, 2009 at 06:00

i hope your really ok please let us all know worried about you
tim
November 30th, 2009 at 18:17

i am a fan of knight rider and others but i want to ask you something you may have never been asked before.
ARE YOU A CHRISTIAN? A BELIEVER OF GOD AND JESUS CHRIST”? IF NOT I HOPE YOU WILL SO I CAN MEET YOU IN HEAVEN. YOU WILL PROBLY NOT EVER SEE THIS OR READ IT
BUT I WILL PRAY THAT YOU KNOW THE LORD.
hoff real girlfriend
November 30th, 2009 at 18:30

tim shut up this for the hoff not you
hoff real girlfriend
December 3rd, 2009 at 06:10

hey hoff i believe you not them call me
wtf
December 3rd, 2009 at 08:19

yeah tim, shit up! the HOFF doesn’t need your pansy-ass jesus crap! he already has a god to worship… a much more powerful god than yours… a god named… VODKA!
wtf
December 3rd, 2009 at 08:21

LOL@ my typo! that rules!

although how would one go about shitting up? maybe stand on one’s head and push really, really, REALLY hard?
hoff real girlfriend
December 3rd, 2009 at 18:51

wtf go away
hoff real girlfriend
December 4th, 2009 at 01:21

hey hoff are doing las vegas bowl
hoff real girlfriend
December 5th, 2009 at 09:09

please call me wish isee u in person david this is carla
wtf
December 5th, 2009 at 09:37

no carla, YOU go away, back to your padded cell. the HOFF is obviously too drunk to talk to you right now. not to mention the fact that HE HAS NO IDEA YOU EVEN EXIST, you psycho.

and i can guarantee you he ISN’T doing the vegas bowl. the only bowl that dude is doing these days is the one made of porcelain. you know, the big one. in the bathroom. full of water. the one he’s probably on his knees hugging right now (assuming he’s woken up from his alcohol coma).

and what’s up with him and the vodka, anyway? “hasselhoff” isn’t a russian name, it’s german! shouldn’t he be getting hammered on beer instead??

and i have another question: the hoff was a male model and a soap opera star, his ex-wife was a model and a soap opera star, they were both big sex symbol type people on baywatch… so how the hell did both their daughters turn out so goddamn ugly??? are they adopted or something?? i mean shit, one of them is a fat pig, and the other one looks like she crawled out of some gnarly arkansas trailer park for retards. what happened to those poor girls?? i’m thinking maybe their parents suffered some chromosome damage from too much UV exposure during all those long baywatch shoots, and passed the mutated DNA on to their offspring. that’s the only thing i can think of… seriously, how else could all those nice attractive german genes produce such butt-ugly kids??
hoff real girlfriend
December 6th, 2009 at 00:39

please shut up he does know me you fool and you know nothing met him more than once i told you this you are rude i write him a real letter leave us alone and the world what a creep
hoff real girlfriend
December 6th, 2009 at 00:41

oh shut up how rude what a creep i told i met him more than once he knows me alright now the likes of you leave the planet
hoff real girlfriend
December 6th, 2009 at 00:43

to owners of this website this w person is a jerk please remove him at once im writing david about this foolish website
hoff real girlfriend
December 6th, 2009 at 00:44

t o owners remove w he is a creep and so is your website
wtf
December 6th, 2009 at 04:22

now carla, surely you know you can’t get me removed from attuworld just for being a jerk and a creep. jerks and creeps are people too, after all (and if we can’t hang out on attuworld, where are we supposed to go?).

however, i think people CAN be removed for cyber-stalking the HOFF, so you’d better watch yourself. it looks like you’re on some pretty thin ice.

by the way, i hope you know that nobody here believes that you’ve really met the HOFF. we all know you’re making the whole thing up. in fact, the next time he comments in this thread (after he sobers up), i’m going to ask him. he’ll probably be like “carla who?” (because he’ll still be a little hung over) and i’ll be like “carla jordan, aka carla hoffstelzer, you know, 300 comments in this thread,” and he’ll be all “oh, you mean that crazy broad who writes me 100 letters a week because she thinks we’re friends or something?” and i’ll be like “yeah! that’s her! so has she ever met you in person?” and he’ll be all “hell no! i’ve had a restraining order in force against that kook since the first 1000 letters arrived back in 1975! if she gets within five miles of me they’ll throw a butterfly net over her head, wrap her up in a straitjacket, and lock her back up at the funny farm where she belongs!”

and what will you say then, you looney tune?

(btw, my prediction is that whatever it is, it’ll be completely devoid of punctuation.)
hoff real girlfriend
December 6th, 2009 at 06:17

i have photos i never posts and i dont care what you say leave me alone david knows me not you and likes me so there how dare you call me a liar
hoff real girlfriend
December 6th, 2009 at 06:40

furthernore if you read david message he said this website is immature people so i believe he meant you and i will him again and have him put on his website your nuts not me you you you get a life and leave me and the hoff alone
wtf
December 6th, 2009 at 10:19

bam! look at that! did i call it or what? nary a punctuation mark to be found! not a comma, not a period, not even an apostrophe!

attu? yaikz? you see that? my prediction came 100% true! what do i win??
hoff real girlfriend
December 6th, 2009 at 18:11

are you and english teacher my writings is not your problem you need mental or rehab leave me alone right now you are rude and have no idea what your talking about did you even go school i dont think so leave us alone
hoff real girlfriend
December 6th, 2009 at 18:16

leave me and david alone seek help now you a very sick person and dont even know it poor thing
hoff real girlfriend
December 6th, 2009 at 18:25

you win o prize how is that i dont care i write the hoff real mail about this foolish website but im having fun ha ha ha merry christmas
wtf
December 6th, 2009 at 21:05

merry christmas to you too, carla! the only problem is that christmas is supposed to be a time to hang out with friends and family, and i don’t think you have any, so your christmas probably isn’t going to actually be very merry at all, is it? see, i honestly think you’re suffering from psychotic delusional disorder, or maybe even full-blown schizophrenia (have you ever heard of obsessed fan syndrome? have you ever been diagnosed with a delusional disorder or other psychosis? shizophrenia? you know there are medicines that can help you, right? are you taking them like you should?), and a lot of the time, disorders like yours develop when people feel very lonely. that’s why it’s so poignant to see you write “merry christmas”— you’re obviously a very lonely person who has no one to spend christmas with. poor carla!

(and it’s funny you should ask whether i’m an english teacher, because i actually used to be. english was my major in college and i taught high school and middle school for a while. i don’t do that anymore (no money or job security in it, especially not in california), but i still know plenty about things like grammar and punctuation, so if you’d like some pointers, just ask! i can direct you to those three funny keys right in a row just to the right of the letter M on your keyboard, and to the two others to the right of the letter L, and i can teach you all about when to press them! there’s also that cool little guy at the top of the number 1 key! he comes in handy all the time!)

so why don’t you have any friends, carla? is it because you’re always lashing out at everyone, telling them to “shut up” and calling them names? or do you maybe just have really poor personal hygiene? or maybe both?? were you abused as a child? made fun of by the other kids at school? did they call you “crazy carla” or maybe “kooky carla”..? what about “creepy carla” or “cranky carla” or “crusty carla” or “psychotic delusional carla”?? or maybe just “stinky”..??
hoff real girlfriend
December 7th, 2009 at 02:14

leave ne alone rude rude rude i have more friends and family then you probably live with pigs because you are one im really sick of this im none of them at all leave me alone i hate you
hoff real girlfriend
December 7th, 2009 at 02:15

shut up now david tell this person to stop he is making mad
hoff real girlfriend
December 7th, 2009 at 02:18

here is a good word for you jackass sorry david this guy is too much
hoff real girlfriend
December 7th, 2009 at 05:56

so long im not doing this website until see the real hoff on here and i dont think will w there is no need to be mean and rude to me you need mental and rehab you need a new life go to the moon we dont want you on earth i feel sorry for you your nothing more then a bully i care nothing about this rat website i dont that was the hoff he more class if it was surprised at you david sorry i dont know what to believe me w i know him he knows me i dont care what you say so long and leave me alone
wtf
December 7th, 2009 at 07:03

oh whatever. i tried for months to be nice to you, and all you did was tell me to shut up and accuse me of trying to steal your email or some such nonsense. if you’re rude to me, i’ll be rude back. if you’re nice, i’ll be nice back. it’s that simple.

and you know, that’s pretty much how it works everywhere in this world— you get back what you give out. i’m surprised you haven’t learned that yet at your age. but the fact that you haven’t might explain why, instead of having a healthy and normal social life, you’re a lonely, bitter, hasselhoff-obsessed loon.

the next time the hoff comments here, i’m going to ask him point blank whether he knows you. if he says he does, then i’ll apologize to you for not believing you. if he says he doesn’t, then you can kiss my fuzzy white buttocks.

and IF he says he knows you, i’m also going to ask him who he likes better, you or lisa jane…
hoff real girlfriend
December 7th, 2009 at 08:58

rude rude i don t think the hoff and your rude
hoff real girlfriend
December 7th, 2009 at 09:01

you rude rude i dont care im not lying you are rude im not aloon and he does know me so give it up i dont thnk that is the hoff
hoff real girlfriend
December 7th, 2009 at 09:03

im not a liar
hoff real girlfriend
December 7th, 2009 at 09:04

i am not a liar
hoff real girlfriend
December 8th, 2009 at 16:55

david call me
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 00:33

i font believe any of it call me carla now
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 00:51

david hoff for some who is half dead you sure look good to me i dont understand those jerks
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 04:16

dear creepy w the more i think about how rude you are the madder i get you are a faceless stranger how dare you talk to me or anyone like that i sure the hoff did not like your comments about his lovely kids who the heck are you a god i dont think so you need to apolgize to them and me and i do know him and knows me why would a lie you need to leave the planet rude rude rude how dare you
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 06:32

hey hoff shopping with hayley take me
Aircraft Parts
December 9th, 2009 at 06:42

The Trafford Centre, Manchester, I met The Hoff for a public book signing of his new autobiography ‘Making Waves’. It was great to see The Hoff in the flesh.

Stephen Riley, Manchester
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 06:53

who cares
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 06:55

i love you david hasselhoff and wish we could hang out i hope i see in person i didnt see you this year yet did in 2008 2 didnt get to talk you
wtf
December 9th, 2009 at 06:59

hey crusty carla, i’ve been meaning to ask you: is it only in the evenings when you’re drunk that you believe you’re the hoff’s “real girlfriend,” or is this a 24/7 psychosis we’re talking about here? like, in the morning, when you’re sober, do you still believe your crazy delusions, or do you recognize them for what they are and lie in bed wallowing in shame and self-loathing and loneliness? does it make you cry when you remember that you’re all alone in the world and that the hoff has no idea you exist?

also, have you ever been married? or even had a boyfriend?

do you have a job?

how much do you drink in an average day? and what do you drink? wine (fortified, of course)? beer? vodka, like the hoff?

did you take a shower today? do you ever take showers?

how many cats do you have?

i know you won’t answer my questions, and if you do, you won’t use any punctuation, but that’s OK! happy holidays, you looney tune! don’t drink and drive!
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 08:00

shut up you stupid stupid rotten creep leave me i hate your ugly guts so does the hoff i hate hate hate drop dead now see david this guy is just mean to me make him stop how someone kills you soon miserable creep
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 08:01

i write him every day you morhon
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 08:02

die die die today right now die dead
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 08:05

attuworld ownes this w guy is a creep you need to remove this stupid stupid website now
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 08:07

leave me alone you are all stupid
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 08:10

im not a loon but you sure are stupid stupid stupid and ugly pig
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 08:12

i love the hoff l love the hoff i love hoff i love hoff ha haha ha ha hahaa hey w maybe your all alone ha haha ha ha haha
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 08:26

david hasselhoff can you please this w guy and all that you do know me please david you always remember i know it tell w im not crazy please the real hoff
wtf
December 9th, 2009 at 08:58

LOL! you’re chanting “i love the hoff” over and over, and then laughing at ME??

and by the way, didn’t the hoff almost DIE like a week and a half ago? and wasn’t that like the third time this year he had to be hospitalized for trying to drink himself to death? i think the dude has bigger issues on his radar right now than commenting on attuworld… it looks to me like you’re going to have to be patient and let him straighten his life out before you can expect him to come here and get your back (which he won’t do anyway).

and come clean now, carla… you and lisa jane are the same person, aren’t you? is it a split personality thing, or is it just some weird game you play to while away the lonely hours?
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 18:00

no im not lisa jane but youmust leave me alone just shut up
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 18:05

do you read internet wenn photos david and hayley suhopping not dead very alive just stop bothering me your no hoff fan
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 18:11

this is lisa jane hey i love you w marry me now no just kidding im not lisa jane but i think your the hoff pretender
hoff real girlfriend
December 9th, 2009 at 18:17

why are you so stupid no no no no shut up weirdo leave me and us alone you are so stupid
Yaikz!
December 9th, 2009 at 23:20

Gentlemen, I suggest we leave this poor girl alone…
It starts to get a bit sad now.

Hoff real girlfriend, I think you better move on. The Hoff is not here and never was. And I think he never will be. (but he is welcome, because he is The Hoff)
wtf
December 10th, 2009 at 00:03

seriously? damn.. i was hoping to get this thread up to 500 comments!

but yaikz! is telling the truth, carla. the HOFF was never really here— i admit it, it was me all along.

and yaikz!, you stopped me just in time, because my next plan was to start posting as the hoff’s daughters! maybe even get them arguing with each other on here… that would have been a hoot.

but seriously, you do realize that “carla” is just putting everyone on, right? she’s just a troll pretending to be a crazy hoff fan. that’s been obvious to me for a long time, but it was fun playing along with “her.”

(and btw, i really am positive that carla=lisa jane— there’s no difference at all in their writing styles other then the caps lock key. they’re just two different sides of the same troll).

to the person behind the “carla” character: it’s been fun! goodbye, and i hope to see you trolling here again someday!
hoff real girlfriend
December 10th, 2009 at 01:02

oh shut up im not lisa jane never was im not stupid i knew it was not the hoff i not a character and i really do know him leave his kids alone i write him and not a troll mean wicked and rude rot in hell i not pretending like you i stay if i want to you people are assholes for sure david would never read this stupid junk how cruel i write hoff today he going to be very mad jerks
hoff real girlfriend
December 10th, 2009 at 01:03

shame shame shame onall of you
hoff real girlfriend
December 10th, 2009 at 01:06

i m not lisa jane not at all jerks
hoff real girlfriend
December 10th, 2009 at 01:27

how dare play with someone like that this is meanest ever im mad hurt and just mad you should remove this junk website now this isnt right i knew it wasnt him he would never talk to me like that never you should all get stoned im not done yet you people are asshole w rot burn die
hoff real girlfriend
December 10th, 2009 at 04:07

cruel mean nasty rotten pigs creeps worselow lifes in ground that is what you monsters are bullies this abuse im reporting this website to all how dare you miserable sob
hoff real girlfriend
December 16th, 2009 at 05:14

please tell w to leave me alone i have phone no for the hoff lawyers if i call them they will not like it leave me alone and him too
wtf
December 16th, 2009 at 06:42

carla, just admit it. you don’t REALLY want anyone here to leave you alone. if you did you wouldn’t keep coming here everyday and posting so many comments. you’re here because you’re lonely and you like the attention.

you’re in vegas, right? here:

http://www.caregiver.com/schizophrenia/supportgroups/states/nevada.htm

and if you’re not really in vegas, that’s ok. NAMI has chapters all over the country!

so do yourself a favor and give those folks a call. i think that’ll end up being a lot healthier for you than coming here every day and making yourself a laughingstock!

although you do make a pretty damn good one…
hoff real girlfriend
December 16th, 2009 at 12:16

blow it out your fucking ass im not sick but you sure are leave me alone jerk im not lonely but you look at every comment from you i dont want your attention i do live in vegas why would l lie they are laughing at you too leave me alone your rudeness person ever stop stop mine your fucking business
hoff real girlfriend
December 17th, 2009 at 01:27

hey w are dead yer
wtf
December 17th, 2009 at 02:04

LOL! carla, you’re such a looney tune… you’re constantly telling me to leave you alone, yet look at how many comments you’ve posted on this site today, all over multiple comment threads, all addressed to me personally, trying to get me to respond to you. and you say you’re not lonely? come on! you’re not fooling anyone. you’ve become totally dependent on this site and the opportunity it affords you to interact with other people— and especially with me (i guess because i’m really the only one who consistently replies to your comments). and that’s OK… but why don’t you just admit it? you, i, and everyone else here knows that if i were to stop talking to you, it would leave a black hole in your life too enormous for even your fifty cats to fill!

now i don’t mind keeping you company, especially if it means i get to mock and insult you and then read the punctuation-free tirades you respond with; and i work from home, so i am able to get on here quite often. however, i do have things to do during the day, and i do have to sleep and eat, and so i can’t be around to hurl schoolyard slurs at you 24 hours a day, unfortunately. sometimes you’re going to have to be a little patient and wait a few hours for your wtf fix. i hope that’s OK. and if it’s not— too fucking bad, psycho!

also, you might want to think about confining your comments to just one or two threads instead of scattering them all over the site willy-nilly. when you respond to something i’ve said, do it in the same thread. otherwise i might never see your comment, and the people who do will have no clue what you’re talking about. heck, they might even start thinking you’re some kind of crazy, ranting, obsessed, schizophrenic— oh, wait… :/
hoff real girlfriend
December 17th, 2009 at 02:17

not want your attention or company
hoff real girlfriend
December 17th, 2009 at 02:22

i only asked if you dead yet someone else is making these comments not me we do you have to write freaking novel last one not me either who ever is doing it knock it off i want you dead dead dead i dont need a fix jerk ass your dreaming
hoff real girlfriend
December 17th, 2009 at 02:35

you are all making me crazy when im not that not me i dont care what you say me all alone dirty rotten pigs
wtf
December 17th, 2009 at 02:39

well see, if you’re having a problem with people impersonating you, THAT’S why you should register an account. then no one else would be able to comment using your name, so you’d never have to worry about being impersonated again. all you need in order to register is an email account.

and don’t give me any of that horseshit about your email being “broken.” if you have internet access, you can get a new email account. it’s that simple. there’s hotmail, yahoo, gmail, whatever. so quit being a baby and go register an email account already. jeez.
hoff real girlfriend
December 17th, 2009 at 02:57

w your fucking nuts
wtf
December 17th, 2009 at 03:09

what about my fucking nuts? you’re not going to start getting sexual with me now, are you? because if you are, then i’m going to need to see a pic first. and you’d better be a lot better to look at than you are to read…
hoff real girlfriend
December 17th, 2009 at 03:21

what are you talking about you are insane and sick i very very hot to hot for you creep
wtf
December 17th, 2009 at 04:05

sorry to confuse you, carla. i was just making a little joke based on your spelling error (you used “your” when you meant “you’re”). but i guess i should have known something like that would sail right over your pointed little head.

and by the way, no one is going to believe you’re hot. if you were, you’d be out leveraging your female anatomy to get yourself backstage at a HOFF concert, instead of sitting at home in front of your computer with a cat on your lap and a parakeet pooping on your shoulder.

of course, if you ARE hot, you could easily prove it, you know. just upload a pic of yourself to a free hosting site and then post the link here in a comment. then we can all see for ourselves what the HOFF has cheated himself out of by ignoring your letters for 30+ years…
hoff real girlfriend
December 17th, 2009 at 05:02

go jump in the ocean and i hope a shark eats you leave me alone i will never ever do email get over it
hoff real girlfriend
December 17th, 2009 at 05:11

there is no concert now jerk i dont have a freaking cat been at alot hoff events he likes me your such freak head and know nothing at all especially about meget it right no pets no email no photos you are rude leave me alot stupid
hoff real girlfriend
December 17th, 2009 at 05:17

i i have no cat no bird i will never do email or photo there is no concert now jerk off and been to plenty hoff events he likes me so fuck you and why are you at your computer all day and night huh my head it not pointed you are so rude leave us alone your totally an asshole and he has sent me alot how about you i fix your ass soon all of you go bother someone else and not me sound your lonely no friends family girlfriend boyfriend pets anyone i think you need major help your twisted leave us all alone
hoff real girlfriend
December 18th, 2009 at 19:04

i done for awhile i had enough of your shit but i better not see my name again i will be watching you all especially w i wrote david he will not like it so leave me alone for good
wtf
December 19th, 2009 at 06:29

carla carla carla carla carla carla carla carla carla carla.

there, did you see that? i hope so, because i don’t want you to be “done for awhile” until you post one more comment. you HAVE to get to triple digits before you take your holiday break from attuworld! one more psychotic rambling rant and BAM, you’ll be there! the big one zero zero!

after that, you should take like six months off and try some self-improvement. you could take an english class and learn to spell and punctuate, maybe get into a 12-step program to get yourself off the booze, try that schizophrenia support group i linked for you, you know, just kinda get your life together. then you can come back here as a new woman (if you really are a woman)! hell, your comments might even be coherent at long last! wouldn’t that be great?
hoff real girlfriend
December 20th, 2009 at 22:45

happy now jerk head goodbye
wtf
December 20th, 2009 at 23:46
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
March 12th, 2010 at 22:16

DEAR DAVID HASSELHOFF CAN YOU GET A FLIGHT OUT OF USA RIGHT NOW PLEASE CAN IINVITE YOU FOR A ART AND CRAFTY EVEING IN THE ART ROOM AND IM DOING ART WORK FOR YOU DAVID HASSELHOFF
LOVE FROM THE HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND PLEASE COME RIGHT NOW PLEASE SEND THIS TO THE HOFF LAP TOP
wtf
March 13th, 2010 at 01:35

sweet! looks like we might make it to 400 comments after all!

(to be honest, i knew it was only a matter of time…)
Attu
March 13th, 2010 at 09:31

So cool to have you here again! We missed you, we really did. What did you do all these months without Da Hoff?
HOFF NEW GIRLFRIEND
March 14th, 2010 at 23:18

PLEASE DAVID HASSELHOFF CAN YOU GET A FLIGHT OUT OF USA RIGHT NOW YOUR NEW GIRLFRIEND WOULD LIKE YOU TO SLEEP IN MY ROOM TO NIGHT AND DAVID HASSELHOFF CAN WE SPEND THE DAY TO GETHER IN MY ART ROOM PLEASE DAVID HASSELHOFF CAN WE DO ART WORK TO GETHER AS LOVERS AND DAVID HASSELHOFF PLEASE CAN WE FALL IN LLOVE PLEASE COME RIGHT NOW
The Hoff
March 15th, 2010 at 07:06

…… No.